The power of Logic

What does the typical Indian middle class consumer do when he wants to make a big ticket purchase, say a car for instance? The first thing he does is start ogling at the car adverts with at most attention. Unfortunately the ad says…blah blah blah…the sunshine car. So what does that mean? Does it mean that he gets more sunshine when he is in the car? He thinks ‘Oh my god. I am buying the goddamn car just to escape this great indian summer and they want to me to have more sunshine’. He feels so unsure and dumb and changes the channel, and another ad keeps repeating “You gotta be dumb…you gotta be dumb”. ‘That’s it’ he says, ‘I cannot take it anymore’.

Of course his travail does not end here. Coaxed by his colleagues and cajoled by his wife, he finally takes time out on a Friday afternoon from office and decides to take the Test Drive. Unfortunately, there are 20 other ‘in-duh?-viduals’ waiting in queue. As he waits for his chance, the sales guys spot him on the spot. He looks at them like a cornered buffalo does a group of hyenas. The great Indian sales pitch then begins. The consumer is bombarded with more information than he can ever assimilate and he is stuffed with ten to fifteen brochures. To top it all, his kids seem to understand everything and they have already decided. So everything seems settled and the salesman smells blood and then all of a sudden our buffalo gets up and says, “I have to think about it!” (Of course he does eventually succumb to the pressure and buys something after going through the above process for two to three times)

Now how does a brand manager perceive this whole process? He designs an ad which talks about the sunshine car. The car that will bring smiles to faces and is fresh and youthful. When he talks about the “you got to be dumb” campaign, he is excited about how much the customer is intrigued and wants to know more. He knows for sure that the ad is good enough to pull the customer to the showroom. His job is done and done well and he has passed the baton to the sales guy.

The sales guy has to deal with, as Uncle Bala says, two kinds of people, the Customers and the Cushtomers*. And in an Indian context, most of them are in the second category. So here he sees this fellow whom he is sure is a cushtomer and diligently goes about educating him about the product and provides him with all the information necessary to make a wise and informed decision. He knows that the cushtomer is hooked and eventhough he is not making the buying decision now, he will eventually. (Ofcourse the cushtomer was made to wait for the test drive to give him an opportunity to explore the products in the showroom and get a feel of their hospitality).

Now the question is why this post is named “The power of logic”…Well that and more in my next post…Cheers.

* Cushtomers are those customers with whom doing business is extremely difficult and mostly non-profitable.

PPPPPPP

The other day when we were trying to decide on a name for our entrepreneurship club, somebody suggested that we call it EEE. When asked to explain what EEE stood for, he said, ‘Well, I don’t know what the first two E’s stand for but the third one is for Entrepreneurship’.

A few days back, I met this marketing manager and as anxious as I am about placements as every other MBA student is, I asked him about preparing for the marketing interview. He told me this – ‘Being a fresher into the Marketing domain make sure you have the fundamentals of Ps, As, Os etc done good’. I was stunned.

What is this with management education (especially marketing) and repeating alphabets? All theories or at least the ones that matter (well, the ones that are talked about) have repeating alphabets. What am I talking about? Check this out – The 4 P’s of marketing, Kenichi Ohmae’s 3 C’s, Nirmalya Kumar’s 3V’s, Management accounting’s 4M’s, the 5S quality principle and the list goes on.

During a discussion on the 4P’s, somebody even suggested that it’s now become the 7Ps with People, Process and Physical Evidence being P number 5, 6, 7. During Dr.Philip Kotler’s visit to Great Lakes, the advertising paraphernalia read “Philip Kotler – The most important P in marketing”.

The point is, why can’t the marketing mix model have for instance 4 P’s, 2E’s and a G. Why do I have to extend the thought process only by adding more P’s?

If current trends continue, the marketing mix of 2050 might well be akin to this interesting dialogue between V and Eva Hammond in the movie ‘V for Vendetta’.

Says V to Eva, “Voilà! In view, a humble vaudevillian veteran, cast vicariously as both victim and villain by the vicissitudes of Fate.This visage, no mere veneer of vanity, is it vestige of the vox populi, now vacant, vanished, as the once vital voice of the verisimilitude now venerates what they once vilified. However, this valorous visitation of a by-gone vexation, stands vivified, and has vowed to vanquish these venal and virulent vermin van-guarding vice and vouchsafing the violently vicious and voracious violation of volition. The only verdict is vengeance; a vendetta, held as a votive, not in vain, for the value and veracity of such shall one day vindicate the vigilant and the virtuous. Verily, this vichyssoise of verbiage veers most verbose vis-à-vis an introduction, and so it is my very good honor to meet you and you may call me V.”


(To be continued)

How much should the CEO know?

Uncle Bala always talks about the key takeaways from the previous class and he always asks for learnings from the CEO’s perspective. I remember an interesting story in this context. It goes something like this – ‘A large acid tank in a chemical factory explodes and 10 workers are seriously injured’. Now this is how this information gets transferred to the top.

Line supervisor to Manufacturing Head: Sir, an acid tank has exploded. We have a few serious injuries.

Man.Head to Div.head: We had an incident in the operations area. There were no casualities.

Div.Head to Country head: We are having some problems down here. But I have allotted a special team to solve them. I am sure the quarterly targets will be met.

Country head to CFO (Head office, USA): We are having some operational issues over here. This quarter’s revenue guidance might have to be revised.

(The CEO and CFO are in Hawaii formulating the ‘Global Strategic Vision’ for the year. They are currently playing golf.)

CEO to CFO: So Jack how is our India operations getting along?

The CFO takes out a placard that reads :(